1. Enjoy simplicity.
2. Smile as much as possible.
3. Live for today.
4. Love each other.
5. Watch the sunset.
6. Read hundreds of books.
7. Listen to great music.
8. Love yourself.
9. Learn from your mistakes.
10. Understand that no one is perfect.
11. Eat ice cream in summer.
12. Build a snow fort.
13. Act like a kid again.
14. Take nothing for gratnted.
15. Live up to your expectations.
…because love wins.
This is Kaden.
You may remember him from a previous blog post. He’s a very old 5 years old this year. I met him a little over a year ago, when he was diagnosed with Osteosarcoma, the same cancer I had 14 years ago. The cancer is a rare form of bone cancer and resulted in us both having Rotationplasty.
He allows me the time to be a part of his life and laughs with me while we play. He fights strong, he’s kind, sweet, and loves his parents. He is a pro video gamer, and has learned to walk as well as me at the age of five. He’s the hero of many, and he is the version of honest that makes the world’s hearts smile.
This Thanksgiving, Kaden is still battling his cancer hard. After it came back, he told me that it was, and that he didn’t want to have to be in the hospital. He wanted to play with his puppy and be a 5 year old. I want that for him too.
You can join in prayer and encouragement of Kaden’s journey by following their new page on facebook: Prayers and Love for Kaden. Kids should not have cancer, and while we work on fixing that, let’s also work on making sure these families facing this atrocity never do it alone.
This holiday season, give your joy and prayers, away.
…because love wins.
*Kaden and I met through an organization near and dear to my heart, Brighter Tomorrows. Feel free to find out more about non-profit here.
Whether you love her or hate her or hate to love her, Taylor Swift does some things right. And we all love that.
All too often, we as humans clutch the burning stoves that are our hazardous relationships. “It’s not what you think,” we say to our friends. “It will get better,” we tell ourselves through our tears. “He won’t hurt me again,” we whisper as we cover up our bruises.
I’m not sure if everything Taylor tells us is in the least dramatic form, but I do applaud her for expressing that she doesn’t always have to stay hopelessly in like with someone. She, and you, can walk away.
This post is simple. If you are in a bad place, it’s okay to get out. You don’t have to stay with a boyfriend or girlfriend who hurts you emotionally. If you are being hurt physically, the time to leave is now. If it’s marriage, honor it as it should be honored (you are welcome to ask me about this), but know that before that, we are not meant to marry every person on the planet.
You will find food, drink, clothing, friends, and joy. You don’t need that hurtful place to keep you in a familiar cage. Just walk away, join Taylor, and me, in saying, “We are never ever getting back together.”
You have the right to be happy being you.
…because love wins.
Some of my good friends are going on their Make-A-Wish trip today. They texted me from their airplane and I could almost hug the joy through the 136 characters on that screen. I wanted to jump up and down for them and scream for happiness and throw rainbows in the air and dance a little too. That’s how exciting this is. And not just because they’re going here:
That’s a Disney Cruise, in case you didn’t know.
Do let me explain.
For those of you who have never heard of Make-A-Wish, it is an organization that grants wishes to children with life threatening or critical illnesses. When the medical world is able to give physical help, Make-A-Wish gives a one time, unforgettable object or event and a major set of smiles. Some children meet Justin Bieber. Some children have their rooms re-designed. And a large majority go to Disney World. Whatever the wish is, it is the choice of the ill child, and it will surely be unlike any experience they have ever had before. They will be treated like royalty, and appropriately given one thing that was seemingly impossible before.
This isn’t the exact one, but you get the idea.
13 years ago in September, I remember my excitement sitting on the airplane for my Make-A-Wish Trip. I had never flown before, just as my wish-kid friend mentioned above has not (Well, now he has, seeing that they should be well landed at this point.) and I remember nearly exploding with excitement about the experience that laid ahead of me. Most importantly though, I remember being so thankful to have my family with me away from a hospital. For just one week, I had everything I had wanted – just to be together.
The thing about cancer or any chronic illness is that it takes a lot from a family. Most specifically – it takes time – in so many ways. I know it seems like those are just cliche words on the screen to you, but I mean that with the depth of my aching heart.
For that reason, these days, I tend to live everything as though it were my greatest wish. Because in reality, every day is. I love airplanes and vacation, but also, anywhere I can be healthy and with my family is a continuation of my Make-A-Wish trip. As my friends will surely tell you, there is no other way to live, and no reason not to.
Simply put, living is a matter of appreciation. Join us! 🙂
…because love wins
*Shanna Decker is a an old soul. Spending nearly two decades personally mentoring families with childhood cancer, she has learned how to turn the most tragic of situations into pure triumph. She is a professional speaker, non-profit co-founder and coordinator, and would love to come present for your event! Learn more about her and contact her on her website.
I walked down the halls of the children’s hospital carrying a small prosthetic leg just 17 years smaller than mine. Its owner and I have almost everything in common.
We know how to be out of control.
We know pain.
We know joy.
We know what it means to understand how terrible cancer is.
We know why kindness matters.
We know why our stuffed animals are so important.
We know why we tell our moms we love them.
We fight in the same army.
The owner of this leg rode in his wheelchair right next to me. Standing no higher than my hip, he is my battle partner on this open field of colored tiles and IV poles. In a war in which we fight with the best armies the world can offer. Those who arm us with research, chemotherapy, prayer, hope, strength, and willpower to move forward.
In a war in which we fight alongside each other against that cancer within us.
Our battle cry is this, childhood cancer:
Take our legs – we can do it.
Take our hair – we can do it.
Take our sleep – we can do it.
Take our dreams – we can do it.
You can take our everything.
Except our hope.
We will not, ever, at any moment, give up our hope. We guard it within one another, and it simply cannot be reached. Its protection is invincible as we walk hand-in-hand or wheelchair in wheelchair carrying each other’s dreams and wants and favorite video games.
For you fight for my life and I fight for yours, battle partner. You make me smile though tears and I tell you it won’t hurt forever. And there is no force stronger than two deep hearts saying no to that cancer.
But to my battle partner, if there comes a time when we must let go of our hands held so tightly, we will still never be apart. For when in war it doesn’t matter where you are; you are never left behind – and always held in the heart.
…because love wins.
I have a new goal: 5,000 likes on my professional facebook page (https://www.Facebook.com/ShannaDecker), and ONE MILLION Twitter followers so that when families with childhood cancer are looking for healing, they come to someone who has walked this road before them.
A simple image of rotationplasty. Check out videos to see how a prosthetic makes this work!
It’s simple – there are a lot of resources, but not as many people who understand childhood cancer and amputation long term. I have a rotationplasty – my leg is backwards. You can see videos here: http://www.becauselovewins.com/media.php?type=2 I have had chemo, been in a hospital for nearly a year, major surgery, asked all the questions, and watched my best friends die.
And I want one thing: to let those doing this after me know that they are not alone. To point them the right direction. To help them heal.
Please help me reach them. I need 5,000 likes on http://www.Facebook.com/ShannaDecker, one million Twitter followers! You can share it on twitter with #5000forcancerkids! and http://www.twitlonger.com/show/jsk2td.
The aim here is that search engines find me first when families are searching a midst childhood cancer and that I can then save them from finding the wrong resources – give them the right direction right away! The aim is to give them hope. To be their hope.
Won’t you help me? 🙂
…because love wins.
I didn’t run first.
You and I both know that we want greatness for our lives. There exists within us all a gnawing that says we have a purpose. Somewhere, behind our hurt, and our bitterness, it’s still there, whispering: “Be alive. Be who you are made to be. Be free.” And when we remember that, we find the want to run. To run faster than we ever have to accomplish what we were set to do. It’s phenomenal, for the most part.
But, it produces some struggle as well. Sometimes it is almost overwhelming to me how badly I want to change the world. How badly I want every single one of you on this planet to know you are not alone. To see all I dream of when I’m staring at the sunset to happen. I know you can relate to some degree. For if you’ve ever dreamed of anything, you probably wish it to happen right now. I know I do.
But real dreams aren’t run after. They are carefully pursued one piece at a time. I know this because three days after my leg was rotated backwards as a seven year old girl, I did not run. No. I did something more important than that. Something that most pass by, but something so important that it deserves to be studied thoroughly.
I stood up.
And for the first time in the months I had been on chemotherapy, I was on my way. For the first time since I was born, I was on a brand new path. For the first time, I realized that running wasn’t nearly as important as having the strength to stand.
So today, remember, we must first stand before we can gain the strength to take the first step. And realize that just standing is a major step on the way to seeing those dreams come true. Be patient. The rest will come and you will learn which step to take next.
…because love wins.
*Shanna Decker is a nationally recognized philanthropist, childhood cancer survivor, amputee, professional fundraiser, non-profit founder, and much more. She speaks world-wide on a variety of topics. To meet her or have her share at your event, contact her through her website. And, have a marvelous day.
Cancer changes everything.
Those three words, “You have cancer.” can take our breath, our peace, and our dreams. We are left on our knees and given nothing (or so we feel), but the small light of hope that the chemo, surgery, or radiation, after all the pain may lead us back to normal. And we all know we wonder if even those things can do the trick.
I know as well as anyone how easy it is to crawl into a hole of despair. Whether our trial is cancer or something else, the “Why me?” question surfaces, and if it doesn’t, others are sure to ask why we don’t feel bad for ourselves. It is an incredible temptation for someone with a chronic illness to allow despair into their lives. Slowly we open the door a little further and it makes us think we’ll never be happy again. It forces our eyes onto the darkness and the pain rather than the future, the hope, and the things we do not yet know in our future.
BUT despair is only a tempation. It has no right to live in our lives. Wherever we are and whatever we’re doing, we are doing it ALIVE. Yes, it may hurt, but pain is temporary. Yes, we may die, but that doesn’t mean it’s the end. Yes, our families may need to learn to live without us for a while, but we will meet again.
Despair is only as large a monster as you let it be. Today, close the door. Dare not to despair. Dare to climb one step at a time and let hope live within you. From one cancer survivor to you, I promise, it can be done. And it will be.
All the sad times before have gone away. Let them do it again today.
…because love wins.
*Shanna Decker is a professional motivational speaker since the age of 7. Follow her online and contact her for your event at: www.BecauseLoveWins.com,www.Facebook.com/ShannaDecker, and https://twitter.com/Shanna_Decker.
Because Love Wins 